


Beyond Recall

by svllux



Series: Dramakidsstuck Backstories [5]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: AU, Gen, Heavy Angst, Humanstuck, Mental Instability, References to Sex, dramakidsstuck, emotional breakdown
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-10
Updated: 2015-02-10
Packaged: 2018-03-11 12:54:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3327605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/svllux/pseuds/svllux
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mituna is worried that after the brain damage he received in a car accident he's lost the ability to love, and that's why he doesn't feel the right way about Latula. Kurloz doesn't know how to respond.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Beyond Recall

Your name is  **KURLOZ MAKARA** and you are **CONCERNED.**

 **ONE MONTH AGO,** you and your bro  **MITUNA CAPTOR**  were involved in an **ACCIDENT** that took your **VOICE** and caused **MITUNA** irreversible **BRAIN DAMAGE** due to a **BLOW ON HIS HEAD.** The **THIRD PARTY** of the accident was none other than **CRONUS AMPORA.** The greasy fucker got off easy with only **TWO WOBBLY SCARS** on that big forehead of his and **MEMORY LOSS** similar to that of **YOU AND MITUNA’S.**  

"Kurloz, it’s kinda like… I don’t know man, I don’t fucking think I love Latula. I mean, hey, I love fucking her—" He waggles his eyebrows, but he sounds half-hearted.

 **YOUR BEST BRO** has just dropped a **PROVERBIAL BOMBSHELL.** You are not sure how to **RESPOND.**

“ _What?_ " You sign, because that seems to be the only appropriate reaction.

The **MEMORY LOSS** spans back to the **BEGINNING OF FRESHMAN YEAR;** you are now in the **MIDDLE OF TENTH GRADE.** **LATULA PYROPE,** better known as **MITUNA’S GIRLFRIEND,** had been the one to **FILL YOU BOTH IN** on what had happened in that **CHUNK OF TIME.** In the **MIDDLE OF FRESHMAN YEAR, MITUNA** and **LATULA** had started **DATING,** and the **SMALL FRIENDSHIP** that had been **BUDDING** between **YOU AND YOUR BRO** and **CRONUS AMPORA** had **WILTED AND DIED** for **UNKNOWN REASONS. MITUNA’S BROTHER,** better know as **SOLLUX CAPTOR,** is the only one who **KNOWS WHAT HAPPENED.** He **DOESN’T LIKE TO TALK ABOUT IT.**

"Just what I fucking said man, I don’t think I love her. Not the right way anyway, fuck if I know. Aren’t you supposed to want to to fucking pound someone into the mattress when you’re in love with ‘em? She’s more like a… A sister, you feel?" You shrug vaguely, but as stated before you are **CONCERNED.** Mituna has more than a small obsession with sex and the fact that he doesn’t feel the drive to have sex with his girlfriend of a year is alarming— even though he can’t remember most of their relationship. 

“ _I don’t understand._ " He sighs in frustration, puts his face in his hands. _  
_

"Me neither… I was just… Just thinking you know? What if the accident, this brain damage they won’t even fucking explain to me, what if it… Fucked something up?" You frown, thinking now is an appropriate time to crawl over and hold him against you. You do that, patting his hair, then pull away.

“ _What do you mean?_ " He’s clenching and unclenching his fingers now, toes curling in his socks. Both are signs he’s going to have a breakdown soon, so you do the sensible thing and situate him between your legs with his back to your chest. Even before the accident, Mituna had had breakdowns such as these; sobbing, thrashing, screaming himself hoarse. It’s an unfortunate trait he and Sollux share, but Mituna’s had become more commonplace since the accident, occurring every one or two days.

"I dunno, Kurloz, it’s just kinda like…" His voice has gotten quiet and he squeezes your hands in a death grip. "They say there are things you never forget. How to ride a bike, how to tie your shoes… Someone you love." His voice is thick with emotion and you press your nose into his neck; he’s shaking. "And since the accident, I don’t… I don’t remember how to ride a bike, Kurloz. I don’t remember how to tie my shoes. And those were both things I knew _before_  the accident, things that shouldn’t be fucked up, but this fucking brain damage fucked with my fucking motor skills and I can’t even hold a fucking pencil anymore and I—” You reach up, cover his mouth, make him stop talking and  _breathe._ Your face paint is smudged on his neck and shoulder. He breathes raggedly for a few moments then curls back into you like he’s trying to hide, hot tears splashing onto your hand

"… What if I don’t remember how to love people, Kurloz?" You frown again, hold him tightly, wish for your fucking voice back so that you don’t have to let go of him for even an instant to talk to him.

“ _There’s nothing wrong with you, Mituna._ ”

He doesn’t have a breakdown that day, at least not the usual kind. He just cries himself to sleep against your chest, shaking the entire time.

_=== > Be Mituna._

Your name is **MITUNA CAPTOR** and there’s no way you can tell your **BEST BUDDY** that every time you **CLOSE YOUR EYES TO KISS LATULA** **,**  you see a **PALE BOY** with a **SCARLESS FACE, STUPID LEATHER JACKET, GREASER HAIR** and a **SMILE THAT LIGHTS UP HIS FACE WHEN HE SEES YOU.**


End file.
